I don't want to go so far as to say big reader bad grades is my favorite work of yours, but it is by quite a large margin the most original, the most surprising. I feel smugly superior for appreciating it, like a Sorondo hipster,
Put this one in the bgbg vault, it’s a total classic.
What’s blown my mind as I’ve shopped more and more downscale due to my adorable small childrens’ childcare costs is how much less choice you get. By the time you arrive at Aldi, you’ve got no choices at all (and almost no one working there too, which explains the prices).
Why thanks! And yes, I think you’re hitting the right note here about options going down in cheaper stores (and the flagrantly skeletal staff) — I work in one of the affordable-type stores, where they seem to only have varieties of an item if they’re trying to include kosher or gluten free or no-sugar alternatives, etc. Less about flavor variety than serving a variety of diets. Which strikes me as…kinda noble(?).
If you don’t mind my asking: what’re some of the frustrations about shopping in a place with “simple” (narrow) options like that, as a parent?
At Aldi, it’s more about how they simply don’t have stuff sometimes—one Saturday, they’d sold out of fucking bananas! A staff member was restocking produce and told me she’d get to it in about 10 minutes. I was there with my 4 year old and there was simply no way he could wait that long. Ask any parent, their kids are probably obsessed with bananas. I had to go to another store.
On the plus side, those trips with my kid are way quicker at Aldi and there’s way fewer problematic aisles—no toys, no aisles just full of cookies or ice cream, etc.
Oh that’s good data in the last line! I work in a store like that. Aspires to a corporate facsimile of what I guess you’d call the corner store? But jeez louise, one of the things management tells us constantly is, if the bananas are empty, drop what you’re doing and fill the bananas.
We sell two THOUSAND bananas a day. It’s a tiny margin, but it’s the kinda staple that’s like a trust thing. Shoppers will come in for bananas once a week, they’ll spend $2 on a dozen of em, it’s no big deal — but if they show up two weeks in a row, and you don’t have bananas, you’ve lost that customer forever.
I'm certain I'm the outlier here, being the old hippy boomer and all, but holy shit I love it!
Hoping this take doesn't come off as condescending, but I am picturing this as work in the style of Leeloo. Just know as one of my favorite movies I've got you on my top shelf!
Hmmm. When I go into the vitamin store to look for stuff, I don't ask what's the best Prostate supplement. I ask which one sells best. They happily lead me to the shelf and pick up a bottle. It's all good.
I worked in 2 supermarkets back in the day. I found it to be pretty soul-crushing. I'm glad someone out there is making literature out of the experience.
When waiting tables the clients often ask you, “What’s YOUR favorite?”. I would answer by either extolling the virtues of the 2nd most expensive dish on the menu, or the special that I just delivered a 30 second in person commercial for. I would never be honest and admit that even with a 30% employee discount I can’t afford to dine here once, let alone enough times to settle on a favorite dinner entrée. “You are the pole.” 😆
This one almost made me sentimental for my retail days in San Francisco, in the big department store full of wandering street people and various characters.
I don't want to go so far as to say big reader bad grades is my favorite work of yours, but it is by quite a large margin the most original, the most surprising. I feel smugly superior for appreciating it, like a Sorondo hipster,
Put this one in the bgbg vault, it’s a total classic.
What’s blown my mind as I’ve shopped more and more downscale due to my adorable small childrens’ childcare costs is how much less choice you get. By the time you arrive at Aldi, you’ve got no choices at all (and almost no one working there too, which explains the prices).
Why thanks! And yes, I think you’re hitting the right note here about options going down in cheaper stores (and the flagrantly skeletal staff) — I work in one of the affordable-type stores, where they seem to only have varieties of an item if they’re trying to include kosher or gluten free or no-sugar alternatives, etc. Less about flavor variety than serving a variety of diets. Which strikes me as…kinda noble(?).
If you don’t mind my asking: what’re some of the frustrations about shopping in a place with “simple” (narrow) options like that, as a parent?
At Aldi, it’s more about how they simply don’t have stuff sometimes—one Saturday, they’d sold out of fucking bananas! A staff member was restocking produce and told me she’d get to it in about 10 minutes. I was there with my 4 year old and there was simply no way he could wait that long. Ask any parent, their kids are probably obsessed with bananas. I had to go to another store.
On the plus side, those trips with my kid are way quicker at Aldi and there’s way fewer problematic aisles—no toys, no aisles just full of cookies or ice cream, etc.
Oh that’s good data in the last line! I work in a store like that. Aspires to a corporate facsimile of what I guess you’d call the corner store? But jeez louise, one of the things management tells us constantly is, if the bananas are empty, drop what you’re doing and fill the bananas.
We sell two THOUSAND bananas a day. It’s a tiny margin, but it’s the kinda staple that’s like a trust thing. Shoppers will come in for bananas once a week, they’ll spend $2 on a dozen of em, it’s no big deal — but if they show up two weeks in a row, and you don’t have bananas, you’ve lost that customer forever.
I'm certain I'm the outlier here, being the old hippy boomer and all, but holy shit I love it!
Hoping this take doesn't come off as condescending, but I am picturing this as work in the style of Leeloo. Just know as one of my favorite movies I've got you on my top shelf!
Identifying a little too much with the quits-and-snaps-fingers guy
Hmmm. When I go into the vitamin store to look for stuff, I don't ask what's the best Prostate supplement. I ask which one sells best. They happily lead me to the shelf and pick up a bottle. It's all good.
Wise wise wise.
#3 made me LOL
I worked in 2 supermarkets back in the day. I found it to be pretty soul-crushing. I'm glad someone out there is making literature out of the experience.
When waiting tables the clients often ask you, “What’s YOUR favorite?”. I would answer by either extolling the virtues of the 2nd most expensive dish on the menu, or the special that I just delivered a 30 second in person commercial for. I would never be honest and admit that even with a 30% employee discount I can’t afford to dine here once, let alone enough times to settle on a favorite dinner entrée. “You are the pole.” 😆
This one almost made me sentimental for my retail days in San Francisco, in the big department store full of wandering street people and various characters.
Damn. We all know how hard it is to make it look this easy.
While I’ve never been fired, I have stomped out, quitting suddenly. Both jobs and men.
The best part is coming back later, with the smug satisfaction of visiting my old stomping grounds, without having to clock-in ever again.
Jaime is a man after my own heart.